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It's been 3 months since I wrote about my journey of fighting cancer. I believe you are in good health and continue to lead our church by the Holy Spirit. I just want to update what I went through over last 3 months and where I'm now and share prayer topics. On July 23rd, I did Ultrasound, CT, and MRI as a routine check up. Imaging found 2 lesions, 1.7cm & 1.5cm spots. Then IR Dr. treated 1.5cm lesion by alcohol ablation procedure on August 20th but unable to remove 1.7cm for some reason. Then he ordered AFP (tumor marker blood test) at end of this month. If the test result numbers under <50,(currently 275, a month ago 450) I do not need treatment but if it numbers >50, interventional radiologist Dr. will do another treatment in October.

Yesterday I saw Dr. Wong who told me that my MELD point is now 31 which is on average now and my point will increase 33 by December this year. You never know transplant may happen this year if I'm lucky but he predicts it will happen most likely by 1st quarter of next year. See what's happening and everything is on God's hand & his time frame!! I do not mind another treatment if I have to do even though it really hurts and significantly drops my appetite causing weight loss. If 1.7cm lesion gets bigger than >3cm or any cancer cell metastasis to other part of the body, I will be kicked out of waiting list and start all over again. Anyways, whatever happens it happens & it's out of my control. I'm always in peace in God & his unfailing love over my life!!

In fact it was hard to comprehend when I had to underwent alcohol ablation under general anesthesia on last month. What's going on? Where is this headed & why is this happening again & again though my strict diet & enough rest? When I was wrestling with all these unanswerable questions on the way home, Ruth was driving and comforted me saying, God has a plan & God has been good to us. I replied, yes! You are right and I smiled. However I almost broke out tears. It was a long day!! I was disheartened and even complaining toward God. I must confess I did not understand this.

God, however, did not leave me in unbelief and reminded Psalm 7:2, "The Lord looks down from heaven in all mankind to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God." When I was in emotional wrestling, I was spiritually drained & became lethargic and apathetic. I truly felt useless and becoming more burden to family & coworkers in the church. But the word of God is telling me now that don't sweat or despair over what I can't do. Look up to God and I'm in God's hand. God has placed me in this trial and he had a plan for me. The psalmist says, "God continually looks for those who seek God, for he wants to strengthen their hearts and bless them." Regardless what's going on in my body whether good or bad, I can rejoice his presence in my daily life and believe that he will completely restore me in his time to render his glory through my current trials.

Indebted yours,

Ruth & David Kim.